<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Nonexistent Hate by Error_Unavaliable</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27101083">Nonexistent Hate</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Error_Unavaliable/pseuds/Error_Unavaliable'>Error_Unavaliable</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Does this count as DadSchlatt?, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort (Maybe?) - Freeform, idk?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 04:28:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,955</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27101083</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Error_Unavaliable/pseuds/Error_Unavaliable</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy didn't expect things to play out the way it did. But thats okay</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jschlatt &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>361</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Nonexistent Hate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Despite what everyone believed Tommy didn’t truly hate Schlatt. After all everything they did was only for the entertainment of they’re audience. He could just respawn and the few injuries he does have after escaping he can heal with just healing potions but they’re were times where he’s unable to bring potions on him in his inventory. The fact that people still directed hate at Schlatt for things that were roleplay angered and saddened him.</p><p> </p><p>Schlatt and him didn’t always see eye to eye but he knew Schlatt wasn’t a bad guy from what Wilbur has told him, the few conversations they have had outside of being in front of camera was peaceful and honestly calming to know that Schlatt didn’t hate his guts. But even if he was a little less on guard while off camera he was still tense. Afraid after everything that has happened after all the traumatic respawns he’s had to go through the involves getting impaled or dying any other way.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy never really knew what to say or do when people pointed out how he treats his friends but they don’t really understand that's just how he is. He does apologize and is very insecure about a lot of things. He knows deep down he has this sense of loathing not for others but for himself. He knew he had a few problems, like the fact he was overly touched, starved from lack of physical human contact and he’d take any hug he could get.</p><p> </p><p>He’d work himself to the bone being an overachiever but also because he felt like overworking himself to the point of exhaustion was a good way of self punishment for all the crap he says to his friends but of course he’s never out right told any of his friends he does this. They’d probably watch him like a hawk if they knew and he’d never be able to work alone on anything again after that.</p><p> </p><p>Despite everything that people see happening on the Dream SMP they don’t know what goes on behind the scenes and for that Tommy will forever be grateful because he doesn’t know if he’d ever be able to handle the judgment he’d get if they found out how he treated himself how he <b>hated</b> himself.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy had decided to create a small cottage in the middle of a forest not too far from Manburg or the SMP having told Wilbur and the others ahead of time and given them his location if they needed him. He had already gotten a good portion of the house done within such a short amount of time and wasn’t originally planning on working himself to the bone but after thinking over it a part of him felt like he needed to push himself more.</p><p> </p><p>That he wasn’t working hard enough. <b>That he wasn’t enough</b>. He shook that thought out of his head and sighed and began to continue working. He was already tired and hadn’t slept for a long time he couldn’t remember how long but he knew it was a long time so when night went by with fighting off mobs repairing damage to the house from mobs and then continuing working in dim light of the moon he was exhausted by the time the sun came up.</p><p> </p><p>His arms and legs hurt, he probably had bags under his eyes and his eyelids were drooping a bit. He still didn’t give up and went out to gather more wood. He already had furnaces, a bed, some chest placed down with a crafting table and had a few spare items just in case.</p><p> </p><p>He had gone out to get more wood just to have it for spare when he woke up but hadn’t expected to almost collapse on the way back. He had slumped against a tree and used it for support to push himself back to full height. He was so tired and his throat felt dry. He hadn’t eaten while working during the night nor had he drank any water either.</p><p> </p><p>He really was pushing himself today wasn’t he. “Tommy?” He hadn’t expected to hear an all too familiar voice and was about to turn around to look at who it was but the minute he lifted his hand from the tree to turn he collapsed.</p><p> </p><p>“Son of a bitch” He quietly muttered as he dropped to the ground, his arms and legs shaking. Fast approaching footsteps could be heard and none other than Schlatt knelt in front of him, surprins worry and concern written across his face, his lips pulled into a frown.</p><p> </p><p>“Calm down kid don’t push yourself” He snorted and Schlatt rolled his eyes. “Wilbur told me you didn’t go back to Pogtopia last night so he asked for help to find you, didn’t think you’d be awake at this time of dawn but it appears you haven’t slept in the slightest” Schlatt huffed. Tommy rolled his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m fine” He retorted to Schlatt and braced his hand against the tree and pushed himself to stand but he stumbled and almost fell forward but Schlatt placed his hands on his shoulders to keep him steady.</p><p> </p><p>“You're clearly not fine if you're stumbling, and you look like total crap” Schlatt bluntly replied. “I’m helping you whether you want me to or not” Schlatt said, his voice leaving no room for argument so he didn’t try to fight him. He let Schlatt pull his right arm over his shoulders and wrap his arm around Tommy’s lower back helping support him to stand and not stumble.<br/>
<br/>
Getting to his cottage was a bit more faster with the help of Schlatt and when they did get they’re Schlatt sat him on the bed. He half expected Schlatt to make a mocking comment and leave but remembered Schlatt wasn’t like that off camera. So he was a bit surprised when Schlatt kneels next to the bed and gives him a slightly angered look.</p><p> </p><p>“Now kid, you gonna tell me why you almost collapsed in the middle of the forest and look like you haven’t slept in days” </p><p> </p><p>He didn’t reply and instead crossed his arms and looked anywhere but at Schlatt who noticed his avoidance of his gaze and sighed standing to full height and bringing out his communicator. “Guess I’ll have to contact Wilbur, Dream and Techno” He muttered.</p><p> </p><p>“No, don’t you fucking dare” Tommy hissed.</p><p><br/>
“Then tell me what the fuck you were thinking” Schlatt responded his anger and surprising concern laced in his voice. Tommy frowned and clenched his fists. He didn’t want to tell Schlatt because the minute he reveals everything he knows for a fact Schlatt will go to Wilbur, Techno, Dream and everyone else and tell them what he was doing or going through. </p><p> </p><p>Another thing Tommy also hated about working himself to the bone was that it left him not only physically drained but also mentally. He did this once a week, worked himself to the bone and then had a breakdown after it reached a boiling point when his mind couldn’t keep back all the terrible thoughts that took up so much of his energy to push back to the deepest, darkest part of his mind.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy would have laughed a little at his thoughts. A lot of his swimming and degrading thoughts were about how pathetic he was and he probably did look pathetic to Schlatt, like a fucking spooked deer caught in headlights. A cornered animal.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy hadn’t noticed it but he slowly began to shake as the silence drew on and tears gathered at the corner of his eyes. <b>You don’t deserve your friends</b>. Those words were always the first to come to his mind and they were always the breaking point for him when he was in a state like this. Because he knew deep down those words were true.</p><p> </p><p>He let the tears stream down his face and let himself start sobbing and shaking digging his nails into his arms. He hadn’t expected to feel arms wrap around him and whispering of comforting words that were never there before but that seemed to make everything just spill out of him. He didn’t hesitate to hug Schlatt back and began to speak without even thinking.</p><p> </p><p>Mumbling about his self hatred, how he worked himself to the point of exhaustion as a form of punishment for the fucked up way he treated his friends, how he didn’t deserve any of them, how he was nothing but a huge disappointment to everyone he’s ever met and tried to impress. With every confession Schlatt's hug got tighter but not to the point of suffocating.</p><p> </p><p>He had never expected Schlatt of all people to be the one to comfort him after something like this happened. He never expected to be sitting there crying into Schlatt's shoulder while hugging him like he was a life line. He expected something like this from maybe Wilbur or even Tubbo or even Dream and Niki but never Schlatt.</p><p> </p><p>He didn’t think Schlatt hated him <strike>(A small part of him did think that)</strike> but he also assumed Schlatt didn’t like him either and he told this to Schlatt himself during his mumbling.</p><p> </p><p>“Listen kid” Schlatt sighed. “I don’t hate you, nor do I dislike you in any way, you're a good kid. Smart, energetic and obviously care about your friends. But you need to take care of yourself not just for your own sake but for your friends as well”</p><p> </p><p>He nodded and continued to quietly sob until it died down. At some point Schlatt had gotten some more messages asking if he had found Tommy. He had pulled away from the hug to quickly respond before going back to comforting Tommy. “I’m still going to have to tell Wilbur and the others about this though” Schlatt sighed. Tommy nodded his head, whipping away the few tears he had left.</p><p> </p><p>“We're here for ya kid, you can’t expect to do everything on your own” He nodded again and kept silent. Schlatt left the cottage to stand outside and call Wilbur and the others into a group call and talk to them about what happened.</p><p> </p><p>When Schlatt came back he sat down on the ground beside the bed and told him to get some sleep and they’d work out everything when he woke up. Tommy didn’t know why but he listened and the minute he laid down he was out like a light.</p><p> </p><p>Schlatt on the other hand didn’t move from his spot until he decided to run a hand gently through Tommy’s hair which the kid unknowingly leaned into in his sleep. Schlatt had meant everything he had said about Tommy. About how he was a good kid and energetic. It was nice to have Tommy and Tubbo around to bring more liveliness to the server. </p><p> </p><p>It didn’t take long for Wilbur, Dream, Techno and Niki to arrive at the small cottage since they had wanted to check on Tommy themselves but they were all surprised to find Tommy fast asleep on the bed Schlatt sitting on the ground his face against the edge of the bed and one hand above Tommy's head, both fast asleep.</p><p> </p><p>Techno did take a picture for blackmail later on. And when the two did wake up they all did talk about what Tommy had told Schlatt who then relayed that info to them. They promised to help Tommy and in a way this whole ordeal made a part of Tommy realize that he in some unknown and unique way did deserve his friends. The thought that Schlatt or the others hated him drained away into nothing because he learned that that hate was nonexistent.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>